Reflection

My Boy

I was writing a friend today and realized that almost all of my blog is about challenges, trials and tribulations. In that moment; I realized the real reason why I started writing it in the first place. Surely my intentions were to help anyone who was feeling lost or overwhelmed about all the crazy places AUTISM takes, you but more so its about how much it is soooooooo worth it! 

Dakota is such an amazing kid in his own right and so many times I feel that he is not given a chance simply because people either don't understand but more importantly wont take the time to understand.
 He has had more than his fair share of obstacles-- BUT the one thing that came through right away was what a beautiful child he was! EVERYWHERE  I took him people would always remark about what an angel he was--- I was never one who oogled of babies and I thought of course my child was cute  but I was always amazed at how many people approached me about Dakota.

It wasn't long that the AUTISM started creeping into Dakotas life but it was all OK while he was small and cute --- he could blend --- then puberty and middle school came and it was a nightmare--- What Has Happened???Why don't these people see the same kid they did a year or two ago???Why would they give him a chance-- He was getting taller and heavier and a force to be reckoned with--All of a sudden all those people were intimidated afraid or wanting to "whip his behaviors into shape!"

Now that he has become a young man the challenges are different yet similar. There are no supports or protection under the law anymore---He is just out there and so little interest not only for him but for all the others who will be here at this point soon,too!

No where to go, No options to find people who will mentor or buddy with these kids whose greatest deficit is social interaction with Typical People. Its not that the parent cannot provide these interactions for their kids, its more about the fact that our kids need connections with others that ARE NOT FAMILY. They need people who understand them and are willing to accept their behavior and still be there for them. Someone who can give a small amount of time and be there as an extension of their family. Someone who is not afraid and someone who is willing to take time to educate themselves to be able to provide a friendship that WONT GO AWAY just because they act out. In this litigious society there's always the fear too that even tho there is no intent our kids could lash out and potentially hurt someone resulting in a law suit--- Its a scary thing!   

 My Boy is such an amazing creature and I love him so much-- He has taught me so much more than I could ever learn from an educational institution. He is funny and thoughtful and so incredibliy smart. His brain is a giant memory box and he has so much to contribute but sadly even those few kids that intereact with  him  dont realize his potential. He tries sometime to get into the conversation but the kids run on a different RPM than he does. It takes some time to deficer his thought and speaking patterns but once you take the time to listen and develop his train of thought you learn he has everything we do it just comes out differently.

The other night I said something about a TV show having "crap" on and he laughed and laughed till he almost couldn't see straight and it was so joyful to see him have a "moment of Normalcy". To know he has such great potential gives me great joy and I only hope that in the future someone out there will see what I see .

For now I just want to encourage those who read this to be aware of what a great gift your child is even with this DAMN AUTISM and if you dont have someone who is Autistic to appreciate your your "typical" kids even when they drive you nuts AND to hopefully embrace this article and pass it on to someone who can learn from it!