Over the course of the first weeks of this year I have had a couple of "discussions" via email with Moms who have had specific issues which I believe should be posted here. I am quite sure if you go back among the already existing posts you may find similar subjects but I am convinced that these subjects bare repeating......
Both of these are subjects that I would not consider to be "resolutions" but more a promise to yourself to not get sucked up into other peoples opinions and observations about your child and his good or negative behavior.
The first is IEP's and the IEP team and the way you pour your heart into these events and come out drained , emotional and for the most part feeling defeated-- If I could advise any parent only one thing it would be this;
I went thru so many years of IEP's and I swear it took more of a toll on me than caring for my son--One thing that kept me going was I knew I was his voice and whether they liked it or not . I was a part of the IEP team and my input weighed as heavily if not more heavily than all the others combined--
Stand up for all you believe in and do not give in--BUT remember that its only a small part of your childs life.
Come 22 and he exits there is still a lot of living left . The transition services--SUCK There is nothing out there right now-----These kids have a typical life expectancy and they will be in the community far longer than the time that they spend in school
I guess what I am saying is "perspective' Don't let those school numb heads get to you I am sorry for all the tears and stress I put myself thru only to realize that all I fought for was gone once school was no longer a part of his life.
If I had the opportunity to give additional information on my experience
It would be this
We have to remember that these kids disability is their behavior When someone, anyone who is a part of the team that is involved with your child reacts in a way that does not " sit right " with you -- DO NOT dismiss it as you being to sensitive "GO WITH YOUR GUT" If your child develops behavior in a new setting don't always blame the Autism --look at the people and environment SOMETHING has changed--I certainly am not saying that a person or persons are bad or mistreating what I am saying is there is potential for a "mis-match" Not every person can get along or like every other person and sometimes that can make all the difference in a therapy or a program or a class. Do not be apprehensive to change the sooner you do it the sooner you will get {hopefully} more positive behavior and results not to mention your child will more at ease...
So for now these are things that I want to leave you with--I am not a resolution type of a girl but I think realizing all the mistakes I made over the years -- Trying to give small purview to my experience may help someone else> For Now no resolutions just promises ---to yourself to keep a keen eye and a peaceful frame of mind when you are helping your Autistic Individual.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
New Year 2012
Happy Year to everyone who passes through my "thoughts" Of course the new year comes with another plan to be more fastidious about posting more often! It seems as though I have many thoughts, opinions or observations that I want to write about the struggle always seems to be finding the time to sit down to post. There is always a conscientious effort to blog when it doesn't take away from Dakotas time however I do loose some of my thoughts when I put them off --I guess just another sign of old age creeping up on me!
Last year was rather inert-- although I did manage to get Dakota Community Integration thru a Fair Hearing with IRC and an Administrative Hearing Judge. When the AB trailer 9 went into affect funding was cut drastically and community integration went down in flames for most clients-- however there are "exceptions" that allow the Regional Centers to fund this program but unfortunately it does not come easily. So that was one of the highlights of the year. We were able to attend a few television tapings including American Idol and Americas Got Talent and then went thru the regular events of the year -- only to top off the last week of the year but volunteering to help decorate the Rose Parade Floats.
One message I cannot repeat enough is the importance of getting your " Specially Challenged Individuals out in the typical community as much as humanly possible. I truly believe that although these kids need the safe haven of spending some of their time and days with kids that have challenges by the same token they absolutely need the typical Community experience ON A REGULAR BASIS. Not only is it good give them the exposure and ability to view and model from typical individuals BUT we need to expose the community to Autism and desensitize them from shunning or kids and disabilities in general.
We have become such a judgemental society -- no matter what you see, most make a decision almost immediately what their opinion is of either a person or a situation. We need to educate people that it is not necessarily the first impression that dictates what is to be. The ability to be compassionate , empathetic and accepting is slowly disappearing from our society-- We need to promote bringing it back. So many live with the opinion that they have to have what the next guy has, either clothes cars, homes, possessions, personality etc. If someone is walking down the Mall and they don't have the coolest clothes or phone or whatever the immediate reaction is they are a dork or don't deserve to be there--we need to stop it and stop now-- The next time you find yourself drawing a conclusion --please just stop and think for a minute and put yourself in that persons place before you draw judgement--
This challenge is for our kids of course but it is for society in general it is a mantra we should embrace for the New Year and the all the years to follow. We can make this a better place and it starts with people opening their mind to possibilities.
Last year was rather inert-- although I did manage to get Dakota Community Integration thru a Fair Hearing with IRC and an Administrative Hearing Judge. When the AB trailer 9 went into affect funding was cut drastically and community integration went down in flames for most clients-- however there are "exceptions" that allow the Regional Centers to fund this program but unfortunately it does not come easily. So that was one of the highlights of the year. We were able to attend a few television tapings including American Idol and Americas Got Talent and then went thru the regular events of the year -- only to top off the last week of the year but volunteering to help decorate the Rose Parade Floats.
One message I cannot repeat enough is the importance of getting your " Specially Challenged Individuals out in the typical community as much as humanly possible. I truly believe that although these kids need the safe haven of spending some of their time and days with kids that have challenges by the same token they absolutely need the typical Community experience ON A REGULAR BASIS. Not only is it good give them the exposure and ability to view and model from typical individuals BUT we need to expose the community to Autism and desensitize them from shunning or kids and disabilities in general.
We have become such a judgemental society -- no matter what you see, most make a decision almost immediately what their opinion is of either a person or a situation. We need to educate people that it is not necessarily the first impression that dictates what is to be. The ability to be compassionate , empathetic and accepting is slowly disappearing from our society-- We need to promote bringing it back. So many live with the opinion that they have to have what the next guy has, either clothes cars, homes, possessions, personality etc. If someone is walking down the Mall and they don't have the coolest clothes or phone or whatever the immediate reaction is they are a dork or don't deserve to be there--we need to stop it and stop now-- The next time you find yourself drawing a conclusion --please just stop and think for a minute and put yourself in that persons place before you draw judgement--
This challenge is for our kids of course but it is for society in general it is a mantra we should embrace for the New Year and the all the years to follow. We can make this a better place and it starts with people opening their mind to possibilities.
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