Fooling Myself--I need a Pit-Bull

Again my optomism kicked me in the ass---I guess I thought that maybe the Chaffey Joiny Union High School District might--just might--do the right thing--OH SILLY ME!

Now I will seek out and find a pit-bull attorney to help me --- I will not take my marbles and go home. Its about Dakota and whats right for him as well as others-I will press on I am naming names and I am pulling out all the stops-- I have gone to the television stations and a couple of Stae Senators-- next are the newspapers.Hopefully I can fix this--- Here is the explanantion as briefly as I could write it--- To Whom ever Will Listen and Take Interest;

I don't know where to go or whom to talk to but I need help and I willing to ask anyone who can offer a positive solution--- This involves a School District, the promises they made to my son who is Autistic along with several other Anxiety Disorders and a situation that I believe is unfair, potentially unlawful and plain ridiculous.

My son will turn 22 in September and is technically "aged out" in the eyes of the Chaffey Joint Union High School District. This is according to their interpretation of the California Ed Code 56026[c][4][B]and more importantly [D].

For the past 2 to 3 years when we held our IEP's {individual education plan} there has been repeated discussions about Dakota's completion of school and graduation. During these meetings we discussed over and over about the fact that Dakota's birthday was in September but "protocol" within the CJUHS district has been that if a students birthday occurred after the start of the year that student was allowed to complete the semester he was in---{and there is at least one student I know of that in fact did just that 2 years ago I believe there are several others I just don't have their names}
Over and Over again the district told him "You will be able to go thru Fall 2008" and "Complete school in January 2009" He repeats this quite often at school as well as home---It is his mantra---his plan---his schedule---his routine. It is programmed into his head like a hardwired electronic device.

On July 31st 2008 I received a letter from the CJUHS district stating that Dakota could not return to school --- 25 days before school starts. I immediately contacted CJUHS district to try to straighten this mess out---surly there must be either a misunderstanding.

There had been no exit strategies planned, no exit IEP's written, no transitional goals written. No participation in the senior activities like the Senior Breakfast and the Senior Luau, No preparation for walking in graduation June of 2008 and no Certificate of Completion. As a matter of fact I contacted the Vice Principle in charge of Special Education Sandra Cooke on the campus of Alta Loma High School in FEBRUARY 2008--- 3 different times to inquire how Dakota's graduation would be handled since he would be attending first Semester in Fall 2008-Not once did anyone from the school or the district contact me to dispute that Dakota would return in Fall 2008 AND I was told {by Sandra Cooke} that since he would be returning in Fall 2008 he would complete his semester first and participate in all the activities June of 2009.

In the past 30 days I have been turning myself inside out trying to "reason" with the district to do "the right thing". Repeatedly they have taken the position Ed Code- is Ed code and Dakota is "aged out" He CANNOT return to school. I was summoned to a "mock" IEP to discuss Dakotas situation - on the agenda it clearly states Dakota cannot return --- a decision made before the meeting even convened-a violation of law; I was not allowed to present all my evidence of exceptions in the law that could be considered as a way to allow Dakota to complete his school as planned-again a violation of law; and there were no decisions made by the "team" they all sat there and let the district do what they intended to do. I refused to sign this "IEP" and went home devastated. What will happen to my son when he learns that he can't go back to the place he has been promised and looking forward too?
I then contacted the Assistant Superintendent Bill Bertran and asked for the district to reconsider this absolutely horrible decision. I also presented additional evidence to support the possibility of an "open door" in the ED Code that would allow Dakota to finish his semester as planned. California ED Code56026[c][4][D] where it states in the second half of the provision that the eligibility dates cannotbe extended SOLEY on the BASIS that the individual did not meet his goals or objectives----
Meaning that they could extend them for other reasons-In my interpretation. It does not use the word "Inclusive" which would then indicate no exceptions. Mr. Bertran agreed that he understood how a person could read that interpretation but he had to take it to the "council"-including the Superintendent Mathew Holton and 4 other "cabinet members"---2 days later I received a phone call from Mr.Bertran indicating that they looked at this and decided that they still would not allow Dakota to return to school-that they felt that if they did that it would set precedent-{hello they already did it in years gone by} Again I am in disbelief.

I now have filed a Due Process and filed with the office of Civil Rights again with the hope that this would place Dakota in a "stay- put" mode allowing him to remain in his classroom until the matter was resolved AND again the District is refusing to allow him this placement - another violation of law.

I am at my wits end and I need help.
I need a champion; I need someone to understand that this is a young man who will be severely affected by the actions of this district and their failure to deliver as promised---
Its one Kid and one Semester--- It is that simple

What has happened to making decisions that benefit the individual? Why are they so adamant about this? It seems like there is more to this than meets the eye.
Is there anyone out there able to help me??

Thank You for Your Consideration

T

50/50Chance

Well I had my meeting with the Assistant Superintendent this afternoon and I have to say that I am "Cautiously Optimistic"

Although it feels like I have been beating my head up against a wall up to this point I actually feel that this time I was able to provide an opening that could allow the district the ability to acquiesce .

No harm No foul just do what I see as the right thing----I will have word on their decision Thursday I will keep you posted.

Here We go Again

I wont elaborate about whats going on just yet-- But AGAIN I find myself in a battle with the school district--

It has consumed the past few weeks and I have been basically unable to concentrate on any thing else--- there have been meetings,phone calls and emails and each time I think I have it cinched up and it falls apart again--- I am making one last attempt to resolve the matter with the superintendent or the assistant superintendent the begining of this week and if I do not succeed all hell will break loose--This is one last semester for Dakota and although there is a part of me that says I should just "cool my jets" and forget it--- It is not my nature to allow the nonsense that seems to be unfolding------

STAY TUNED!

Trouble with Wristbands

Following the "Be Careful what you wish for" entry just had to add this little tidbit!

In March there was a pep rally at school --which the kids received a wristband to designate the appropriate time they attend the rally. After it was over Dakota wanted to leave it on--OK no harm No Foul--{yeah right} In April he had to have another surgery and they needed to put a wristband on while he was i the surgery center so trying to be creative and not "upset the apple cart" I made arrangements for them to put it on the same arm ---{boy was I going wrong at this point} Along comes May and there was a special dance Dak was to attend and VIOLA another wristband--That's right now we have 3 --OH HOW CUTE----------N O T !

Summer had come and these damn paper like bracelets are still on and causing a royal pain in my --you know what!It has now become and OCD thing --he absolutely is not relinquishing possession of these wristbands-- they are getting dirty and grubby and I want to cut them off but he is freaked about loosing them. They have also impeded him from swimming --he will not get in a pool and he is very touchy even about a shower---which is where I draw the line. When he showers the one arm in bent at the elbow and does not get washed from the elbow to the fingers.

You might say cut them off I have in fact tried in the middle of the night and he has awoke from dead sleep to find me with scissors and he flipped out. I even went and bought new wristbands and tried to negotiate replacing the old ones with new ones NO DEAL. I went so far as to buy a masculine silver bracelet and tried to reason with him that he could wear this all the time and swim or shower with out worrying and he just will not budge-- it is certainly a case of be careful what you wish for --I have been trying to get him to wear a medic-alert bracelet for years and I thought oh how cute maybe now I can get him to wear one of these

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA The joke is on me

Yesterday I drove all the way down to the beach and I could not get him out of the car. he refused to even touch the sand for fear that I would try to get him to go down to the water and ruin the bracelets--It is driving me crazy but i guess when others are dealing with things like kids digging into their diapers and flinging poop --I don't have anything to complain about!

I can tell you one thing when those bands come off THAT IS IT. There will be no more wristbands if I can control it .In the future if it is necessary for something like a concert before we leave the venue that band will be off! I have certainly learned my lesson.

"Be careful what you wish for"--AGAIN!

In the Autism community where I "hail" from there is a saying "Be careful what you wish for" ---with our children we are always wishing or hoping or thinking if only our child would do this or that--- wouldn't it be nice if they could wake up tomorrow and be "normal": WHATEVER N O R M A L IS !

What many of us have found that often times this "train of thought" backfires! Mostly with behaviors; many of the people I know who live with Autism have fought to interrupt and redirect a behavior only to find that; the child will replace that behavior with one that is even more annoying or destructive.

One of my mentors warned me of this situation early on and it has become almost something I have to laugh about when I find myself succeeding at "conquering" a behavior. Because Dak has replaced it with one that is even more irritating!

The rule of thumb is to assess the behavior and decide whether you and your family can live with this ritual and whether or not it is a self injurious behavior. If you can tolerate it --My advice is leave it alone --believe me it will pass--It may be 2 or 3 years but it will go away E V E N T U A L L Y. I know it seems like a lifetime but one day you will realize POOF it's gone. The only "ticks or behaviors" I do battle with are self -injurious . If the child is beating his head into a wall, ripping the cuticles from his fingers or {my personal favorite} twisting the hair out of his head --you really must address these. It wont be easy and you may not succeed in a timely manner but I maintain that if you stay at it be consistent you will prevail!