So we are TV-O-holics around our house and its actually a subject that deserves its own excerpt but this BLOG is specifically about the content of Parenthood {Channel 4 on Tuesday 10 pm-Pacific Time}
Several parents who live with Autism have commented that it is too difficult to watch sometimes--
this is because it hits too close to home-- Too honest too real. I concur.However its is also the reason why I don't miss an episode. I don't think I ever come away from it without thinking to myself that I could not have said it better.
The premise of the show is a boatload of family with several story lines and multiple characters BUT one family has a son who is diagnosed with Aspbergers- a "high functioning" form of Autism.
This particular episode deals with a trip to the store where Max{the child with Aspergers}recognizes that the man in front of them has 17 items and it is in line at the "Express Lane" "10 items or less". Max resorts to "self help" by reaching in to the mans cart and removing enough items to adhere to the "rules"all the time saying 10 items or less you have 17. The man gets mad and a confrontation ensues. Words are exchanged, Max's Father has Granddad take Max back to the store to retreive another item and all of a sudden the man calls Max a "retard" and Dad hauls off and slugs the guy. Dad knows what he did is wrong and its not his nature but never-the-less "its done> By the end of the program Max's father is brooding and Mom approaches him with "Whats Wrong?" {she doesn't know that any of this happened --Dad has kept it from her}He finally admits to what happened and that although he knows its wrong and its not his nature to do something like that ---- That IT FELT GOOD-- and that he was angry and it was OK to be angry cuz people just don't get it.
OK I wont go into anymore detail about the episode but I have to embellish on what the writers "captured"
The frustration and anger.They were so eloquent in describing not only the feelings but actions. Its not OK to lash out and Its not OK to invade other peoples space but sometimes its so overwhelming the "primal" feelings surface. When you have a child with Autism it is as if the whole family is "broken". I know there are others who have different challenges and Autism isn't anymore important. Just about everyone has "stuff" to deal with and those who don't are very lucky. When a child has Autism its ratcheted up because there's a whole person with a mental disorder NoOne seems to recognize, identify, understand or tolerate. People only see an individual who is "acting" out of the norm. Human Nature very rarely allows most people to empathize with an Autistics behavior AND its devastating for the parents.
When you continue to see such intolerance in the world about ANYTHING it grabs you to the core. The only thing that generates in your soul is "What will happen to my child once I am gone??? Who will be able to not only tolerate but understand his behavior?> Who will make sure that MY CHILD will be taken care of the way he deserves? Who will speak for him? Who will make sure that he is treated with dignity and respect? who will give him the ability to live like anyone else? and the questions go on----
This is what generates the anger -- some would say the "loss of control" I would say is the mis-trust of others who behave badly when others are not watching them.
Ironic that our children are judged on their inappropriate behavior yet typical people behave badly all the time and it is tolerated.Only because typical people will cover-up, apologize, grovel or repent for their mistakes and our kids don't have that filter.
Well once again I have climbed up on the "soapbox"
I hope that I was able to reach even one person and change their perspective.
Afteralll that's what this BLOG is about!
