Its been quite a while since Dakota was physically sick-- I often find myself perplexed about this situation. Everyone has aches and pains both children and adults, yet it is a rare occurrence for Dakota to complain about ANYTHING. At least when it comes to physiological maladies.
Dakota has what I consider a high threshold for pain . However one might assume that he feels the pain but DOES NOT express his discomfort. With a diagnosis of autism it will always be a guessing game. He has speech and can express himself, yet when he is sick, his concern is more about how he wants it to go away and how bad he feels, NOT to tell anyone about it.
Surely he must have an pain in his leg, a headache, a cramp in a muscle or sinus pressure. Does he tell me??? NO I cannot imagine going thru life and having these small ailments and not taking preventative measures. I can assure you that HE just does not let anyone know how he is feeling., That is incredibly frustrating.
I am sure I am not the only parent who has a kid like this. It becomes a guessing game to figure out why and what is happening. I have often remarked it is like having an infant. You rely on your instincts and his behavior coupled with the physical "traits". {is he hot?/ is he grabbing or rubbing a part of his body? and of course is he physically ill?]
Well this week it was a wild ride-- somehow, somewhere Dakota got sick --really sick.Funny thing is that he is so sequestered from "people" I cant even figure out where he got it--BUT HE GOT IT!
The middle of the week he started with vomiting followed by diarrhea and before the week was over he woke up with chills and spiking temperature. OK so its not any different than anyone adult or child going thru This is where I say "WRONG"
Dakota not only absolutely hates to throw up but he hates to be anywhere near the toilet much less BEND OVER the toilet--when he gets sick.Needless to say there was a mess everywhere. Hey that's parenthood. This is a kid who does not spit, does not blow his nose, does not swallow pills so why would I think that issues with the toilet are unusual?{smile} By the time it subsided I had plastic on the mattress, almost all the sheets and towels in the house either in the washer or the dryer or waiting for the laundry. Coupled with that about 10 showers to clean up the boy, it was circus .
I guess why I write about this, is just another observation about how different it is when you have a kid that has challenges vs a kid that has the ability to understand in a typical manor.I would venture to guess that some parents who have autistic kids may not think about things like this. Dealing with the Autism is tough enough without adding additional care when they are sick. I just want to urge anyone caring for an autistic individual to keep a "keen eye" and "an ear to the ground". These kids could be telling us they are sick before the physical attributes show themselves.
All I can say is what a week !
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Monday, January 10, 2011
Already a Week
Already---- a week has gone by---
So many things swirling around in my head yet I question the importance to others who might read this.I guess the real purpose of a blog is to express whatever you think or feel and not to be concerned with the "observers".
Looking back at "a year in a glance" there were many ups and downs . We lost a very important component to Dakota's independence and that was huge-- His friend,coach and mentor Brad Loula died in his sleep last June.The hardest part about his passing is the residual effect that it potentially has on Dakota--Autism is a very strange "animal" when it comes to emotion and feelings. Perhaps even the issues that we have had just recently could be Dakota feeling the loss from so many months ago and they are just now surfacing.
As for behaviors that too has been somewhat of a roller coaster. He has been having extreme highs and lows with several aspects of life. He had been attending a program specifically for Autism and somewhere things went sideways and he was lashing out at the person who was working with him so we have temporarily discontinued the program till he seems ready and accepting of trying again.
Add to that the extreme emotional acting out that has been on going for the past year -- it is continuing BUT I have to admit that it has drastically calmed down and in fact I have made some in-roads to acknowledge it and even discuss with Dakota about recognizing it and handling it --The occurrence level seems to be reducing. He and I continue to do the dance around the hair twisting and if I have not written and except about this I will -- although I know it has been an ongoing problem for several years-- since he broke his leg---AGAIN i will give him credit I have seen improvement in this area also;so I guess I have a lot to be happy about!
Dakota did take a "Get up and Move" Dance class that was very beneficial-- however not enough sessions so I hope that another one will pop up in the near future>
I have to admit that my prayers ALWAYS ask for baby steps of improvement and I cant ask for more-- in that respect I have to say 2010 was OK.Every day we can get up and muddle thru without incident is a day I want to cheer. If it is a day with incident as long as it can be managed or is less than awful ya gotta cheer, too!
Its really about just being thankful for life not being anymore complicated than it is..... Kinda the old adage that "when life hands you lemons you make lemonade" BUT you gotta add the sugar!
So many things swirling around in my head yet I question the importance to others who might read this.I guess the real purpose of a blog is to express whatever you think or feel and not to be concerned with the "observers".
Looking back at "a year in a glance" there were many ups and downs . We lost a very important component to Dakota's independence and that was huge-- His friend,coach and mentor Brad Loula died in his sleep last June.The hardest part about his passing is the residual effect that it potentially has on Dakota--Autism is a very strange "animal" when it comes to emotion and feelings. Perhaps even the issues that we have had just recently could be Dakota feeling the loss from so many months ago and they are just now surfacing.
As for behaviors that too has been somewhat of a roller coaster. He has been having extreme highs and lows with several aspects of life. He had been attending a program specifically for Autism and somewhere things went sideways and he was lashing out at the person who was working with him so we have temporarily discontinued the program till he seems ready and accepting of trying again.
Add to that the extreme emotional acting out that has been on going for the past year -- it is continuing BUT I have to admit that it has drastically calmed down and in fact I have made some in-roads to acknowledge it and even discuss with Dakota about recognizing it and handling it --The occurrence level seems to be reducing. He and I continue to do the dance around the hair twisting and if I have not written and except about this I will -- although I know it has been an ongoing problem for several years-- since he broke his leg---AGAIN i will give him credit I have seen improvement in this area also;so I guess I have a lot to be happy about!
Dakota did take a "Get up and Move" Dance class that was very beneficial-- however not enough sessions so I hope that another one will pop up in the near future>
I have to admit that my prayers ALWAYS ask for baby steps of improvement and I cant ask for more-- in that respect I have to say 2010 was OK.Every day we can get up and muddle thru without incident is a day I want to cheer. If it is a day with incident as long as it can be managed or is less than awful ya gotta cheer, too!
Its really about just being thankful for life not being anymore complicated than it is..... Kinda the old adage that "when life hands you lemons you make lemonade" BUT you gotta add the sugar!
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Another Puzzle to Decifer!
I am starting to understand more clearly why they signify Autism with puzzle pieces. It seems that your are always trying to figure out what is causing a behavior or emotion! Hence putting the puzzle together.
Its funny as I reflect on this time last year we were having pretty extreme behavior several times a week and I was at my wits end to decifer the cause. Although he is still exhibiting some of this behavior for the most part it seems to have subsided tremendously. What seems to replace that, is another emotional component. He is having bouts of extreme depression that brings on sobbing and the inability to express why he is feeling this way.
As a Mother {or a parent for that matter} it tears your heart out to see your child struggle with emotion that cant be explained. And, with Autism this is rare, in and of itself because typically Autism is pretty much void of feeling or emotion. So it is double edged --- In one way you hate to see the child depressed and crying still theres another very small part of you that thinks that at least it is a typical behavior. Yet, one you really dont want your child to experience.
The crux of this dilemma is a bit more complicated--When I analyze the trigger for this behavior it seems to happen when something is ending or coming to an end--If he goes to his fathers it occurs on the day he is coming back, when hes watching a film or live theater it happens at the end of the production or even when he has a class that goes for days or weeks when it is time for it to end; that is when the emotion displays itself---{I believe this is separation anxiety} The biggest problem, is that endings are a part of everyday living and you cannot control nor sheild ANY child from this. Try to explain to a typical kid and eventually they understand -- for an Autistic kid, they may never get it---
THAT TEARS ME UP!
The other component is that a pyschologist or pyschaitrist may be able to help for most people . In case of an Autisitic indivdual what can they do other than shove medication down their throats??? Dont get me wrong I beleieve that meds have their place and benefits, I just have a problem with medicating someone { with pyschotropic drugs} who is not conversational and/or unable to express they pain they are feeling. In other words how can you expect and Autistic individual to lay on the couch and pour his guts out when they sometimes barely express basic needs or wants?
It is quite a dilemma in my mind-- I want my child to have peace of mind and to be as mentally healthy as possible, yet I dont trust that medication is the only or absolute way to do that.
Guess that where I segue back to the "puzzle". There simple ones that get put together rather quickly; others are the 1000 piece take forever to assemble.
Its funny as I reflect on this time last year we were having pretty extreme behavior several times a week and I was at my wits end to decifer the cause. Although he is still exhibiting some of this behavior for the most part it seems to have subsided tremendously. What seems to replace that, is another emotional component. He is having bouts of extreme depression that brings on sobbing and the inability to express why he is feeling this way.
As a Mother {or a parent for that matter} it tears your heart out to see your child struggle with emotion that cant be explained. And, with Autism this is rare, in and of itself because typically Autism is pretty much void of feeling or emotion. So it is double edged --- In one way you hate to see the child depressed and crying still theres another very small part of you that thinks that at least it is a typical behavior. Yet, one you really dont want your child to experience.
The crux of this dilemma is a bit more complicated--When I analyze the trigger for this behavior it seems to happen when something is ending or coming to an end--If he goes to his fathers it occurs on the day he is coming back, when hes watching a film or live theater it happens at the end of the production or even when he has a class that goes for days or weeks when it is time for it to end; that is when the emotion displays itself---{I believe this is separation anxiety} The biggest problem, is that endings are a part of everyday living and you cannot control nor sheild ANY child from this. Try to explain to a typical kid and eventually they understand -- for an Autistic kid, they may never get it---
THAT TEARS ME UP!
The other component is that a pyschologist or pyschaitrist may be able to help for most people . In case of an Autisitic indivdual what can they do other than shove medication down their throats??? Dont get me wrong I beleieve that meds have their place and benefits, I just have a problem with medicating someone { with pyschotropic drugs} who is not conversational and/or unable to express they pain they are feeling. In other words how can you expect and Autistic individual to lay on the couch and pour his guts out when they sometimes barely express basic needs or wants?
It is quite a dilemma in my mind-- I want my child to have peace of mind and to be as mentally healthy as possible, yet I dont trust that medication is the only or absolute way to do that.
Guess that where I segue back to the "puzzle". There simple ones that get put together rather quickly; others are the 1000 piece take forever to assemble.
Happy Friggin' New Year 2011
Well every year since I started this blog I swore I was going to write more; and every year some how I drop the ball! So i will start out with good intentions and we will see if I manage to make some headway---
My observation is that I need to make the excerpts shorter but somehow my style of writing like my "gabbing": they are always more than most can take!
So here goes another year; I continue to hope that somehow this will reach even one person who is struggling with one issue and finds comfort or a solution from my experience!
So Happy friggin' New Year lets get this party started-------------
My observation is that I need to make the excerpts shorter but somehow my style of writing like my "gabbing": they are always more than most can take!
So here goes another year; I continue to hope that somehow this will reach even one person who is struggling with one issue and finds comfort or a solution from my experience!
So Happy friggin' New Year lets get this party started-------------
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