WELL --DEEP SIGH---- HERE I AM AND DAK IS STANDING RIGHT OVER ME--SO MUCH FOR HIS 10 PM BED CURFEW---OH DONT MISUNDERSTAND HE WENT TO BED AT 10PM PLEADING FOR ME TO LAY DOWN WITH HIM. 2 HOURS LATER HE IS STILL AWAKE BUT GOD FORBID HE WILL NOT ALLOW A LIGHT OR THE TV TO BE PUT ON IN THE BEDROOM.I KNOWS IT A CONTROL ISSUE COUPLED WITH ANXIETY BUT ITS DRIVING ME TO THE CAMARILLO STATE MENTAL INSTITUTION!!!!!!
SO NOW HE IS PACING BACK AND FORTH MONITORING MY EVERY MOVE AND REFUSING TO SLOW DOWN OR RELAX!!!YIKES
I KNOW I HAVE WRITTEN PREVIOUSLY ABOUT FRUSTRATION BUT I THINK IT IS ONE OF MY BUZZ WORDS FOR THIS DISORDER. IT IS SO INCREDIBLY CONSUMING TO DEAL WITH ALL THAT IS PAST YOUR WAY VIA YOUR CHILD DAILY! YOUR ARE CONSTANTLY ANALYZING OR POSTURING TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT OR BETTER FOR YOUR KIDS. YOU KNOW IF HEY ARE GONNA GIVE YOU A CHILD WITH AUTISM THEY OUGHT TO AT LEAST GIVE YOU COPING STRATEGIES SO YOU DONT GO NUTS TRYING TO FIX EVERYTHING OR FIGURE IT OUT!!!!
IT WORKED -- HE HAS FINALLY AQUIESTED AND DECIDED TO GO TO BED WITHOUT MY COMPANY . I WANT TO BE LOVING ,KIND AND COMPASSIONATE BUT I ALSO NEED HIM TO BECOME INDEPENDENT AND I AM WORRIED THAT HE NEEDS US FOR THINGS THAT HE SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO ON HIS OWN. I KNOW HES NOT A REGULAR KID AND I AM ALWAYS AWARE OF THAT BUT IT IS EQUALLY HARD TO FIND MIDDLE GROUND BETWEEN UPPORTING HIM AND ENABLING.SO NOW HE HAS GONE ON HIS OWN I GUESS I WILL LOG OFF AND CHECK IN ON HIM.
BYE TO ALL FOR NOW WILL WRITE MORE SOON
No comments:
Post a Comment