The Yin and Yang of Autism

Today a mom posted that she was at an "attraction park" and her child had trouble understanding  how the showtimes worked and before she knew it he had eloped and was at the car banging on the window to get in -- CUZ in his mind it was time to go --- I cannot tell you how many times I have had this experience. For those of you with typical kids you get a cranky one or one that decides to take off on you or even one that whines for candy or a balloon ..but I dont think you could even imagine how these types of behaviors just HALT EVERYTHING. Its just the end . You just need to gather your marbles and go home. Some would say "Oh I would never allow a child to dictate my day that way " all I gotta say is walk a mile in anyone of our "Autism Shoes" then tell me what you say !   

I have bought tickets to the Prom, admission to a Haunted House, the Grammy Museum,oh the list goes on and in each of these cases Dak never made it...wasted money??? some would say . What I say is all I can do is present the opportunity and hope he takes it. You run the gammit of emotions your are upset that the money is spent , your are sad cuz your kid is loosing out on an event ,you are disgusted and think you will never do it again then you get some time in thought and you become melencholy and decide that it is better to try and fail than to never have tried........ 

I have said this over and over that I only know what works in our house and for the most part my main goal is to allow Dak to pretty much do what keeps him happy...He already deals with a horrible disorder that turns his thoughts into raging crap so why complicate his life and put him thru any more stress. I know that does not prepare him for the world but I dont think any of us were prepared for Autism .

I think the most frustrating thing is when you have those Ah-Ha moments or what I call shoulda had a  V-8 moment when you see a sparkling ray of brillance come from your child. In that moment you know that he is lost in this world and the world is loosing out on his brillance. Mainly because people will not sit still long enough to notice when things like that occur. Or they are so wrapped up in their own world that they just do not notice because they have effectively tuned him out. Surely a kid like Dakota couldnt have anything worthwhile to contribute. {That is for any child with Autism not just Dakota} I have seen it happen even when people dont mean to do it...Its very odd to be in that situation .

Never the less you, as a parent struggle with what to do and how to handle incidents like this and you get very frustrated , depressed and even start believing that things will never change and you will never see an improvement .  THEN a lightening bolt hits
The most recent case with us; I had just finised balling my eyes out the day before because Dakota has just been having some tumultous days. I have been trying everything to get him to get out to walk in the park or the track, to play a board game , to read  just anything and I was being met with some pretty agressive behaviors and it has been tearing me down. So yesterday they start talking about a Who Concert that was cancelled and tickets were issued for December 17,1979 {mind you he was not even born yet} and he looks at me with a deadpan face and says " that was on a Monday" and "Chritmas Eve was on a Monday that year too! "Now mind you this is a kid who has trouble counting change and I knew better than to call him on it...But of course I grabbed his iPad Calendar and sure enough it was a Monday . I swear it just about took me to the floor.  I dont get it, I dont know how he does it but more importantly no one has ever taken notice ... I realize it is a fleeting skill but it is enough to encourage me to NEVER GIVE UP .... Because I know its in there . and I just need to keep coaxing it out.  Because this is the Yin and Yang of Autism.