Dakota did not say one word until he was 5 years old---Many of the so-called professionals that came to the home and worked with him told me "DON'T GIVE HIM ANYTHING UNLESS HE ASKS FOR IT" that included WATER. Well sorry folks you maybe experts and you can advise me BUT I will not "cave" to their suggestions just because they have read a book.
Needless to say I am probably the biggest enabler on Earth and perhaps not exactly the best title to be given however I am a Momma first and I will do what feels right in my gut! Withholding water was not something I will do!
22 years later language has been a slow process. That's not to say that Dakota has not developed reading skills and cognitive abilities that allow him to have conversation but the DAMN autism just doesn't cooperate. He also is a smart kid and he knows what will get him by-- so he will do everything in his power to utilize as few words as possible.
I am forever hounding him to use a complete sentence. every chance I get I will stop and withhold action until I get at least a noun and a verb !
There are many situations I could use as examples here's but the one I want to use:
I keep re-iterating to him that no one knows what goes on inside his brain if he doesn't tell us-- we cannot read his mind and if he needs something he has to use language--sounds straight forward and easy RIGHT? HA HA HA HA HA HA
Dak is not one who will raid the fridge or cupboards. He will just not eat if it's not fixed for him and set down in front of him-- This could be good in ways --YES again what is the consequence come the day that someone who does not know him has to provide for him---
THEY DON'T KNOW THIS ABOUT HIM!
So have been pounding it in his head you have to ask, you have to let me or someone know if you are hungry,want or need something to eat! You cannot expect us to be mind readers. From that he has emerged with;"Are you hungry Momma?"-- I know that this is the way he tells me that he needs a snack or its time for a meal--
This works well because I know his cryptic code
So one night last week after all was said and done and the evening was wearing on all of a sudden Dak gets up and hes hem-hawing around and he looks at me and says "I'm hungry Mama"
Oh MY GOD -- the clouds parted and I saw the heavens-- How many years have we been working on this??? Well I jumped up and immediately took him to the kitchen to discuss options.
It may sound simple and insignificant to most --Its not to me.It feels like the result of hours of instruction and prompting and it just paid off!
The lament is DO NOT EVER GIVE UP-BE RELENTLESS
IT DOES DELIVER DIVIDENDS!
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