THE HANDS

I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS TOPIC FOR A COUPLE OF WEEKS  AND JUST FEEL THE TIME IS RIGHT AND I HAVE MY THOUGHTS ORGANIZED TO WRITE ABOUT THIS---

I HAVE BEEN PRETTY LUCKY WITH DAKOTA -- VERY EARLY ON  I STARTED TRIMMING HIS NAILS  ON HIS HANDS AND FEET AS WELL AS DEVISING WAYS TO  GET HIM TO LET ME CUT HIS HAIR  AND BELIEVE ME I  HAVE HEARD HORROR STORIES FROM  MANY WHO CANT GET NEAR THEIR AUTISTIC CHILDREN WITH SCISSORS , CLIPPERS OR NAIL FILES.                                                          I THINK THAT I ALREADY POSTED AN EXERPT ABOUT "FINGERS FORD" AND WHAT WE WENT THROUGH WITH THE BANDAIDS ON HIS FINGERS AND HOW HE MANAGED TO QUIT CHEWING HIS NAILS  AND NOW HE HAS BEAUTIFUL HANDS-- IT IS ALL PHASES--

THERE  IS QUITE A DISCUSSION AMONG THOSE OF US WHO LIVE WITH AUTISM ABOUT BEHAVIORS EXCHANGING  PLACES-IN OTHER WORDS YOU MAY BE ABLE TO GET YOUR CHILD TO QUIT CHEWING ON A TOWEL BUT THEN HE WILL  START TWISTING HIS HAIR -- SO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE AWARE OF WHAT YOU WISH FOR BECAUSE YOU MAY END UP WITH  A DIFFERENT BEHAVIOR THAT MIGHT BE HARDER TO TOLERATE OR LESS APPROPRIATE THAN THE ONE THE CHILD ALREADY HAS -- KINDA THE LOGIC OF BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR-- GRANTED SOME OF THESE BEHAVIORS CAN DRIVE YOU STRAIGHT UP THE WALL BUT YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BEAR IN MIND THAT THERE IS A REASON FOR THE STIMULATION AND UNTIL YOU CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT THAT IS   AND YOU MAKE NEVER   --ITS IS AN ABSOLUTE THAT YOUR CHILD WILL SEEK OUT SOMETHING TO QUELL THE FEELING S AND STATIC IN HIS HEAD. ITHE KEY IS TO FIND SOMETHING THAT IS AGE APPROPRIATE FOR YOUR CHILD AND SOMETHING YOU CAN LIVE WITH BECAUSE YOU JUST CANT SHUT DOWN THAT STIMULATION AND EXPECT THE CHILD  COPE .

ALL THAT COME BACK TO THE STRUGGLES I HAVE HAD AND BEEN HAVING WITH THE HANDS!!!! YES HE HAS STOPPED CHEWING HIS NAILS DOWN TO THE QUICK AND HE DOES ALLOW ME TO CLEAN TRIM AND FILE HIS NAILS NOW  BUT I HAVE RECENTLY DEDUCTED WE HAVE A N MORE SIGNIFICANT ISSUE. I THINK IT IS TACTILE AND I AM NOT SURE  THIS WILL GO AWAY-- THIS IS WHAT I HAVE EXPERIENCED

1.DAKOTA HAS BEEN ADAMANT ABOUT REFUSING TO PARCIPATE IN WASHING HIS HAIR  THAT HAS BEEN FOREVER       2.SINCE THE NAILS HAVE RETURNED HE HAS BEEN VERY PARTICULAR ABOUT THE PLACEMENT OF HIS HANDS WITH FINGERS OPEN AND GENTLY PLACED ON HIS LEGS  WHENEVE HE SITS DOWN                                                                                   3.THERE IS AN ONGOING BATTLE ABOUT WASHING HIS HANDS  HE IS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO GET TO WASH HIS HANDS THERE HAVE BEEN MANY BATTLES OVER THIS AND  AT THIS TIME THE ONLY WAY HE WILL WASH IS WITH HAND SANTINIZER THAT I HAVE TO CHASE HIM AROUND WITH SMEAR IT ON HIS HANDS AND THEN HE WILL GO TO THE SINK AND RINSE IT OFF---

SO FROM  MY " OBSERVATIONS AND  THINK TANK"  I HAVE COME OUT WITH THIS CONCLUSION  : I HAVE DECIDED THAT ALL THESE THINGS ARE TIED TO HIS INABILITY TO TOLERATE THE FEELINGS OF SOAP ,SHAMPOO OR OTHER TEXTURES ON HIS HANDS--WHICH  IN  TURN CAUSE HIM TO HAVE BEHAVIORS THAT CAUSE THE WAR BETWEEN  US.             I  HAVE TRIED TO EXPLAIN THE IMPORTANCE OF WASHING HIS HANDS AND HIS INDEPENDENCE IN WASHING HIS OWN HAIR   BUT I AM CONVINCED THAT THE PROBLEM IS MUCH BIGGER THAN LOGIC.

SO NOW THAT I HAVE IDENTIFIED  THE REASON FOR THE BATTLES  I HAVE TO GET A GAME PLAN   THE ONLY THOUGHT I HAVE RIGHT NOW IS THAT I HAVE TO SOMEWAY DESENSITIZE HIS  HANDS . THE FUNNY THING IS THAT HE DOES EXCEPT MANY TEXTURES  BUT THERE IS A SPECIFIC TARGET I HAVE TO FOCUS ON.  I AM GOING TO TRY SCRUBBING HIS HANDS BUT I THINK IT IS MORE THE "SLIME" FACTOR  SO MAYBE SOME JELLO???? NOT SURE     I WILL KEEP DOCUMENTING  UNTIL I SUCCEED- - - - - HOPEFULLY

NEEDLESS TO SAY  THIS IS A MINOR  ISSUE BUT AN IMPORTANT ONE NOT ONLY FOR HIS HEALTH AND WELL BEING  BUT SOCIALLY TOO!  

ONCE AGAIN WE WANT OUR CHILD TO DEVELOPE  HIS OWN INDEPENDENCE AND OWN PERSONALITY TRAITS  BUT THERE COMES A TIME WHEN WE AS CARE TAKERS AND THE  SHAPERS OF AN AUTISTIC S  BEHAVIOR HAVE TO  PICK THE BATTLES THAT MATTER  -- THE ONES THAT WILL HELP OUR KIDS BLEND  INTO THE COMMUNITY  NOT STICK OUT!