With every New Year we all seem to have a feeling of renewal , fresh starts and aspirations to do things differently ; Either for health mental or physical or as a way to make ourselves feel better about something that seems "not Right" to us.
As I explained in the last post, oh so long ago things have definitely been different around here and I to had given up on the notion of trying to change or alter life ...Things have been different yet all too much the same and it is something I have struggled with my whole life... I welcome the challenge and excitement of doing things differently yet the old demons of "sameness" follow me like a dark shadow ,,,accompanied by the whispers of disappointment when I don't do what I set out to do....As the years have rolled by I have become much more comfortable with myself and accomplishments, whether they happen or they don't and I would say that even those who know me sometimes wonder why I think and do the way I do...
Again I would say that Autism has kinda put me in this space...
If I have learned no other lesson it is that you can have a grand master plan but when you add autism into the equation the formula can turn into something completely different.That's not to say you don't try that's just to say that you have to be open to alternate outcomes.
So many I have known over the years have had such structure, determination and commitment .... to their daily lives and accomplishments , I admire that . For the last 26 years I have always said "But they don't have autism as a factor"... Thats not to say they don't have bumps in the road or things to overcome however again and again I continue to segregate my situation from theirs on that premise.
The holidays have a way of highlighting this thought process and execution. The last part of the year is always a festive time and everyone has plans, traditions and gatherings. You talk to people on the phone or exchange Christmas cards or even speak to someone passing you n the hall at work and the air is full of things to do . Having family over for Thanksgiving or going skiing for the first winters snow or everyone getting together for the Rose Parade and football game . Shopping, cooking , visiting Santa Claus, wrapping. church or whatever........
Sometimes when you have an individual with Autism IT JUST DOESN'T FLY...
I have said this many times before all you can do is present the opportunity ..its up to the individual to decide whether they take it. What you have to do is prepare yourself for the outcome. You have to be OK if it doesn't go the way you want it too.. You have to be OK to realize that the person in side the body that is plagued with this nasty disorder is doing the best they can and if you push {at least too much} it will turn ugly for you and it will be a nightmare for them.
So my friends I love you all and I know each of us have our own set of circumstances
We just have to March to the beat of our drum .... not someone elses!!!
Happy New Year
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