Ahhhh respite .....didn't even know the word befor entering the world of Autism....
It's a provision for those of us who are caretakers to have someone else assume the responsibility of caring for our "individual "for a couple of hours to allow us to "feel like a human again" "to take some time to go to lunch with a friend or a movie"and know our child is cared for and we can relax!
Yeah..right! now do not misunderstand my sarcasm, it is one of those things that sounds good in theory and somehow gets lost in translation.
For the most part in California specifically our Regional Centers approve and fund 30 hours a month....(usually no more unless a rare case) allowing you to have "hired help" (so you can go to dinner with your hubby or do the above mentioned activities ......) the problem lies with the mechanics ...finding someone who not only is willing to come into your home but accept the conditions of what Autism SOMETIMES brings...that's not to say there are not skilled people out there it is to say they are difficult to find and usually require or at least want more than the 10 dollars an hour a "baby sister"would get for watching the neighbors kids. The agencies have staff yet many are specialized or simply won't take autistic clients...AND once you manage to find someone they may have other clients so it has fit their schedule it can't just be like calling someone up and asking if they can come on the spur of the moment.
The other compnent is the actual act of respite..I'm not saying everyone does this but I find that more than 75% of my respite is running errands, going to doctors appts. Shopping or doing all the things that are either impossible to difficult to do when your child is in tow...
There's no set formula to respite and no one really dictates many rules other than it is to be performed in the home ...which can cause some challenge... Mostly because anyone who is trying to entertain and care for any Individual may want to take a stroll to the park or do an activity outside four walls...no so much for the autistic people but sometimes can or could be an option...
Guess my whole reflection on this stems from my ability to actually go out, meet a friend and actually sit in a restaurant for the first time in YEARS....MY SON HAD A MELTDOWN several years ago in a Carrows and that pretty much ended our ability to go out to eat...there are a few exceptions mostly when we are "vacationing or not in our home town"but for the most part it just doesn't happen.
Everyone needs a lil respite whether you care for a a challenged individual or not...each person chooses what to do...but I can assure you many of us are thrilled to just get a break NOT BECAUSE we don't love our kids and completely accept the responsibility but merely to have a minute or two when YOUR BRAIN isnt working over time second guessing AUTISM....
